Center for Shared Insight, PC

Is “Fear of Missing Out” Really Just a Fear of Commitment?

August 4, 2015
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Posted By: Kristen Hick, Psy.D.

Are you on the hunt for the next thrill, date, or message? FOMO can be a fear of commitment, and Dr. Kristen Hick, Denver relationship therapist, knows how to open hearts to love again.

Greener pastures. A better fit for your “list.” A more “suitable” partner.

No matter what you call him or her, or the general idea, that “perfect fit” keeps you looking, searching and living anywhere but in the present moment and in your present relationship.

Some might say this is simply a case of your relationship skills getting honed, and you will realize that there is a better match out there for you when you are ready for it.

Or is it?

I’m here to say that I think it has more to do with the bewildering plethora of typically superficial online dating sites, social mixers, matchmaking events, etc., surrounding us at all times. The next special him or her is a just a swipe away. And so you keep swiping, emailing, texting, looking…

But, at some point, don’t you have to ask yourself, “What am I really doing?” And even more importantly, “Why am I doing this?”

Fear

The Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) is not only a condition that leads to over-scheduled, depleting—albeit fun-filled—weekends. It is also a condition running rampant in the Denver dating scene, as well as in many other metropolitan cities.

FOMO lends itself to never going on that fourth date, prolonging the relationship status convo for months and months to make sure there is no one better out there, or jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire as soon as things become less than easy or comfortable.

Does this sound familiar? Wonder where it comes from?

Origins of FOMO

There are many origins of the Fear of Missing Out…

  • Family expectations about whom you should or shouldn’t date, love and/or marry.
  • Cultural messages about what it means to be a man/woman or what a relationship should or shouldn’t look like.
  • Fairytales and Romantic Comedies.
  • Ego, feeling you deserve a partner who earns more, can take care of you, will continue reading...

https://www.meetmindful.com/fear-of-commitment/

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