Center for Shared Insight, PC

Dating Lessons Learned from the Coronavirus Pandemic

March 9, 2021
Posted By: Kristen Hick, Psy.D.

The coronavirus pandemic was a time of great learning and self-reflection. You likely are more appreciative and aware than ever before. This time away from social circles and many day-to-day activities has provided you with a different perspective and life lessons that you will never forget. You are a different person than you were when this pandemic began, as we have seen working with clients at Center for Shared Insight in Denver, Colorado, and that transformation is probably a positive one. 

Not only was COVID-19 an opportunity to uncover life lessons, it provided some important dating lessons that can help you far beyond the memories of hand sanitizer and masks. Some of the actions taken during this pandemic included behaviors that could benefit your everyday dating and relationships. In this post, we discuss three core dating lessons from the pandemic and how you can embrace them in the future.

Take it Slow

Any dating that continued during the COVID-19 pandemic was forced to unfold slowly. Especially when so much was unknown and the economy was shut down, and before the days of masks, most dates were happening virtually or in a socially distant way to uphold important health and safety boundaries. This forced people to get to know one another in smaller increments of time, oftentimes through talking via video chat. There was no option to extend dates for hours, sleep together too fast, or plan a getaway together in the early stages of courtship. The pandemic almost turned every romance into a long-distance one and forced people to get to know one another on a deeper level before physical intimacy had an opportunity to unfold. Therefore, people were likely more tuned into the psychological attraction rather than distracted by chemistry or over-the-top date nights out.

Date Creatively

From the typical happy hour first date to dinner and a movie, COVID-19 halted all normal social opportunities to connect and forced creative dates. Dates without alcohol were commonplace too, since most bars were closed, and that helped people remain more clear and present about what was truly unfolding. Even dates without food as a crutch or focal point forced dates to get simple. Creative pandemic dates included hikes, walks in the park, and other safe outdoor adventures. Since time between dates was often longer, people had the opportunity to use video dates and old-fashioned phone calls to keep in touch while socializing was limited. 

Focus Less on the External

Less external influences also helped people be less distracted by what was around them and more focused on the qualities of the person they were with, leading to better choices in many cases. Sometimes if a date was great because you ate at a fancy new downtown restaurant and saw a Broadway show, it’s difficult to understand that often the atmosphere of the date is what made you feel so good, not necessarily the person you shared it with. This goes for group dates and early introductions to friends and family too. Since group settings and get-togethers were very limited, there was also less influence from the thoughts and opinions of others, since those meetings didn't happen as quickly. All this could lead to more clarity about the actual relationship unfolding, with little influence from others or pressure to rush through milestones. 

From taking it slow to dating creatively to focusing less on external influencers, the coronavirus pandemic offered some valuable lessons about successful dating. These learnings can make you a more successful dater in the future as you embrace these principles. At Center for Shared Insight, we help clients identify dating pitfalls and how they can be more successful embracing these three simple ideas, and so much more. From dating your partner again after the pandemic, to stepping back into the dating pool after time off for self-care and self-reflection, we can help at every phase in life. 

We offer a free consultation to get started, which you can learn more about here.

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